I'm not drunk, I'm not wasted, I'm tired really tired. I'm Torned apart, Insecure, Really faking my smile, Extremely sad and Drowning in tears but I don't even know why. As most of people say I ain't reasons for that but do they know the reasons behind the smiles? But still I ain't got reasons, nothing really bad happened in my life yet I'm just a spoiled kid who wants to travel around the world looking for "I don't know what".
I do, I say and I think horrible stuff when I'm drunk and though my body hurts and I'm physically and emotionally tired I can't seem to find another way to feel happy even if it's just for a while.
Oh damn!! I don't love no one I don't even love myself but deep inside there's only one man in my life. My Days without him are so empty, so Different, so useless... I feel and I am mess. Not because of this but I've became a huge mess along the way. I'm lost now and I seem not to find my way back and all I see ahead is darkness, the only place the only shelter I'll ever have.
Why living life so empty even with loads of things?? Why didn't I forget you yet even if I want, even if I fight to but there's always a time when you come back to me, only as a memory because I haven't heard your voice ever since... You know.
I need to be alone but I'm scared of lonely and right now I don't know ANYTHING but I'm scared, I want to be alone away from everything and everyone, I can't stand this anymore, I can't stand life anymore.
I can't stand the fact that I'm alive and I'm wasting someone else's time. I'm crying and as lots of people say I don't have any motives to, well they must know it better than me!
I want to go to a place where no one hears about me, no one asks for me and fake they're worried about me, a place where there's only me, myself and I. I want to disappear, please!
I do, I say and I think horrible stuff when I'm drunk and though my body hurts and I'm physically and emotionally tired I can't seem to find another way to feel happy even if it's just for a while.
Oh damn!! I don't love no one I don't even love myself but deep inside there's only one man in my life. My Days without him are so empty, so Different, so useless... I feel and I am mess. Not because of this but I've became a huge mess along the way. I'm lost now and I seem not to find my way back and all I see ahead is darkness, the only place the only shelter I'll ever have.
Why living life so empty even with loads of things?? Why didn't I forget you yet even if I want, even if I fight to but there's always a time when you come back to me, only as a memory because I haven't heard your voice ever since... You know.
I need to be alone but I'm scared of lonely and right now I don't know ANYTHING but I'm scared, I want to be alone away from everything and everyone, I can't stand this anymore, I can't stand life anymore.
I can't stand the fact that I'm alive and I'm wasting someone else's time. I'm crying and as lots of people say I don't have any motives to, well they must know it better than me!
I want to go to a place where no one hears about me, no one asks for me and fake they're worried about me, a place where there's only me, myself and I. I want to disappear, please!
After New York.
No comments:
Post a Comment